more felty digital fun

 

Pulled out my little wacom tablet this time - and this piece is bigger. Thinking these may need to be photographed though, instead of scanning, bits are getting lost...

New technique - felting with digital

a very rough and quick test to see if this is something worth pursueing - looking at getting myself a 21" cintiq tablet so I can meld my favourite things - what do you think? Worth continuing?

New Cover art for Red Robin Books

Life on the other side of the coin

One month ago I was a WAHM.

One month ago I was terrified of going back to work.

Once month ago I thought our lives would fall apart, I would be a blubbering mess and my kids would immediately become dysfunctional because I was suddenly not around ALL the time.

One month ago I may have been a little off-centre, or self-centred, or psychotic (or all of the above).

Truth is, my kids are fine. They miss me, and I them - but they truly enjoy their time at school and daycare. I am excited to see them at the end of my day - and I do not get as frustrated with them, as I was prone to when we were in each others faces and spaces all the time. Being at work makes me treasure the time I do have more than when I was off in a funny way. Do I wish my days were shorter? YES. Do I wish I could work 4 days instead of 5 - YES! But, it seems my husband is much more capable than I ever gave him credit for and has mastered the art of getting our son on the bus and off to school, and to being home when he needs to be and picking up when he has to - it is lovely that he works for himself and can be flexible when suddenly I am less so.

Does it make me sad? Yes, I'd be lying if I said it did not. My mom was a SAHM, and it was amazing for us as kids. I have enjoyed being home with my little ones so much, they rock my world. And IF we had the income, or if being an illustrator was as lucrative as it was say in the 80's, or IF I could depend on companies to pay on time (or at all) for all my jobs - I would stay home. That is a lot of IF's. I like that my place of employ pays me to stay on top of marketing trends, design software and to use my brain for more than keeping track of how many clean diapers are left and when I will have to wash them again (BTW, I still have to do that as well).

In all honesty there were things I disliked about being home. I disliked making lunch. I disliked the pile of dishes we created all day long. Sometimes I even disliked 3:00pm cause it was still 4 hours to bedtime.

Being back at work has made me realize a few things... I don't have to do it all. REVOLUTIONARY.

Being back at work allows my kids the space they need to explore other relationships - without me.

Being back at work means I get a whole lunch hour to myself - I can run, go to the gym, go shopping, go out for lunch or just update my blog.

Being back at work means I get to dress up and I have a reason to buy those new boots I have wanted for the last couple of years.

There are so many wonderful things about being home with your kids - which is why I have been for almost 4 years out of the last 6. But on the other side of the coin - the work side - it's not so bad. When you have a job you love, people that respect you (and don't spit up on you) and hot coffee on hand, being back at work is kind of... FUN.

Redesigning my website - Adobe Muse

My new website - a work in progress

I have to say thus far I am a big fan of Adobe Muse. For a long time I have wanted to redesign my site, but could find nothing to do exactly what I wanted it to do - with ease. I'd love some feedback on what I have up so far...

A momma's heartsick lament

Here it is - I MISS my kids.

I miss them like mad.

I miss them because I know that suddenly with the beginning of grade one everything has changed. I mean I used to at least have every other day with my boy, and since Z was born, I have had just about every day with her. But with the beginning of the school year, I am scheduled to return to work (more on this later) and my little boy is a big boy, and my baby girl - a toddler. How this all happened is beyond me. It was not that long ago that either one of them was a squealing little baby in my arms, completely and utterly dependent. Not so anymore. I pick Z up at day care and she is happy to see me - bit still wants to play, and is so tired that she does nothing but fall apart until we get to snuggle at bedtime. And even after two days at school Mo has all sorts of new sayings and habits that smack of big kid!

This is made all the more painful because we are coming off arguably the very best summer of my life. I have awesome kids, and no - I did not feel that way every day this summer. But we did a lot. We played in the rain, we danced in the sand, we hiked along rivers and up mountains, we went down in caves, saw dinosaur bones, searched for fossils at the beach, we visited with friends (a lot), we visited with family, I taught Mo to swim, we build castles, we built puzzles, we splash padded, we worked in the garden with Pioneers, we made lemonade with real lemons, we canoe tripped as a family again, we camped with friends, we made new friends, Mo skateboarded, we saw Niagara Falls and Georgian Bay within the space of two weeks, we snuggled, we watched movies, we watched bugs... and I watched my kids. I watched them grow, and grow and grow.

I started a new fitness regimen, I feel better.

I did not get the list I had for around the house even close to done - but you know what? I don't really care. The only time I do is when I have company, then I get a bit worried about it. Our grass is longer than most, and our house is messy. The reason? We are doing stuff all the time, and I would always chose catching frogs over cleaning floors. And so, I surround myself with people who don't care about my house - just us.

Now, I am supposed to be back at work and I am on strike, you see - I am a support staff member at Loyalist. I love my job, I love the people and the students I work with. I am also a 'sometimes' prof - thankfully not this semester - so I am not faced with the decision about whether or not to cross. But I will tell you, striking is not fun. We are not doing it for our well-being, we have already lost a lot of money. But, on the flip side, I am thankful to have a little bit of extra time with my kids as they ease into the routine we'll be in till the very least - next summer. My heart breaks when I think of Mo getting off the bus to someone else, though today he did - just for a bit - and seemed disappointed that I picked him up just as they were about to go outside. Zaley is have great fun at daycare but clings to me for most of the night as she adjusts - and I am thankful that for now I am not driving at 7:30 am.

I know all things change, and time flows on - but for a moment - just a moment, I would not mind a full stop, I'd hold on to my babies and we would all be still, the wind smelling like honeysuckle... in the next moment Mo is running to the school bus and Zaley is doing stunts on the bicycle as we wave him off.

Running for the Cure - and for me.

I have entered another new chapoter in my life - one that once again includes personal fitness. I have been attending Boot Camp for two months now and I am noticing change in how I feel and my confidence level. I still have a long way to go - but I will get there.

I have signed up to RUN 5Km in the Run for the Cure on October 2, in Kingston.

FOr anyone who donates $25 or more I am making these little thank you ORIGINAL illustrations. Here are the first two. If you would like to donate  to the Run for the Cure - through me - please visit The run for the cure website and make a donation today!