Sunday, February 6, 2011

On goodbyes and friendship.

About 6 years ago, I was at the OEYC here in Napanee. I did not know anyone, had a small and demanding baby and was feeling quite lost and lonely during the day. There were not too many people I felt I could connect with, not too many breastfeeding moms, and it seemed my other parenting philosophies also put me in the minority.

But, I saw a few other women and for some reason I wanted to befriend them... and so, I did. The rest  as they say - is history. There were 5 of us in the beginning, going to aquafit with our kids, exercise class, baby yoga, Snoezelin rooming, many picnics in the park and at each others houses. We've shared our heartbreak, our pain, our happiness, our homes, our fears and our triumphs. We have offered each other our undying support and shoulders for crying, laughing or resting heads. We've used our hips to carry each others children when extra help was needed. We have our trust. We have our friendship.

Last year we saw one of our group move to Holland. It was sad for us, but they have made their way very well. And we are glad of it but still miss them.

Today, another dear friend moves to the USA for a great opportunity for her husband and family. I cannot express in words how much she is going to be missed. She is the one I called in tears the first day my boy got on the bus. She sang for us at our wedding. She is someone I could always count on, who liked my kids and did not mind doing me a favour watching them. Someone who guided me when it came to cloth diapers (and saved me a pile of money by passing hers on). Someone who is always ready with a hug, and no judgement. I could go on...

Their moving leaves a big hole in our everyday lives. The energy of the boys, the photos her husband is sooo good at taking and, well - her friendship. I wish them well and I know we will see them in the future - but it will be difficult to just call and say, "Hey, wanna meet at the park for a picnic?"

We love you guys. Good luck in NY.


  1. It's sooo hard to lose friends... not losing the friendship, but losing their physical involvement as real people in our day to day lives. I have seen most of my good friends move out of the city, the province, the country. I know I have support when we can manage it on the phone, but like all the little things you mentioned, there is nothing like being in the same space same time in the actual world. Living side by side, together, is the soil friendships bloom in.